Blame Game!

Every one of us shall give account of himself. Romans 14:12 Take responsibility for your own life. Every one shall carry their own loads. Galatians 6: 5

This household loves college football, and we love Saturdays duirng the fall when we can gather on the deck and cheer on our favorite (Bulldogs) team. The University of Georgia has been fortunate to have some long time winning coaches such as Vince Dooley, Mark Richt, and now Kirby Smart! I’ve no idea how their styles of coaching compare, but I know that each of them has taken the guys on their respective teams and helped bring out the best in each of them.

A couple of weeks ago when UGA was playing South Carolina, we were taken aback that South Carolina was leading 14-3 at halftime. I mean, UGA is #1 in the country! We all know that halftime is just that, and we know that the game is far from over, but it was totally unexpected.

The next week, I saw some pictures and a write up about the frustration of the coaches on the Georgia sideline. It was obvious that there was a lot of frustration and the blame for the sub par performance seemed to be passing from one coach to the other. As the team left the field for the locker room, someone asked Coach Smart, “What will you say in the locker room since the team is performing so poorly?” In other words, “Who gets the blame?”

Fortunately, it went on to say that on the way to the locker room, the team psychologist (who knew a team has a psychologist?) pulled Coach Smart aside and said, “Remember the only way you get 14 points back is to take it play by play.” I translate this into, “Let’s not play the blame game, but rather get the team back to basics.”

Obviously that is great advice not just for football but for life as well. While parenting and teaching kindergarten I learned that kids instinctively play the blame game. Anytime we had an incident and I asked the question, “OK, who started it?” The answer was always the same, “The other one did!”

It’s easy in this life to shift the blame when things don’t go according to plan. Instead of taking responsibility for our decisions and actions, we begin to shift the blame to others. For example, My business would have succeeded if the bank had loaned me more money..I wanted to give more to the church, but my spouse wouldn’t let me..I would be doing great if the doctor hadn’t botched the operation..This team would be winning if we had better assistant coaches! We tend to blame our circumstances for our character deficiences on others.

The problem with blame game shifting is that it stops us from taking constructive action and moving on with our lives. Psychologist Dr. Brenda Shoshanna observes: “Each person you blame is holding on to a piece of your personal power and self respect. Taking responsibility for what’s happening in your life is one of the most empowering things you can do. New choices become availabe…your anger is redirected..you see people and events with new eyes. Remember, responsibility can also be read as response-ability, the ability to respond instead of reacting.”

We will probably never know what happened in that Georgia locker room at halftime, but I have to believe the blame game was probably not a method. When I was growing up, we had a saying, “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar” meaning it is much more effective to be positive and affirming than negative and demanding. What I do know is that the second half Georgia put 21 points on the board and held South Carolina on defense to win the game.

When we constantly blame others for the things that don’t turn out as we had planned, it makes us appear weaker rather than stronger. It takes strength to admit that everyone involved played a part, and the blame should be shared. Otherwise, we begin to think we are the strong one and everyone else is flawed. When we stop blaming others, we develop compassion, and we begin to realize that mistakes are natural and inevitable. They can always be corrected.

It can be really intimidating to take charge of our life, but when it comes to God there’s no wiggle room as far as his word is concerned. In Romans we find these words, “Every one of us shall give an account of himself.” God would have us step out in faith, take responsibility, and with His help, take the next step toward eliminating the blame game in our lives.

Best Days!

For it is written, no eye has seen, no ear has heard, nor has it entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. 1 Corinthians 2:9

Sometimes in this life questions are posed to us that cause us to stop and take a long look at our lives, past, present, and future. The realization that we have more days behind us than ahead of us is sobering, but it is a reality for many of us. Someone recently started a discussion and asked, “What is your best day so far? What is your worst day so far?” The only rule was that your best day couldn’t the birth of a child, and the worst day couldn’t be losing a loved one.

I posed this question to Randy, and he said, “My best day was our wedding day, isn’t that right?” It’s better to err on the side of caution when answering questions some time. After stating the obvious, he could come up with many “best days” and almost as many “worst days.”

I am not as quick, and my mind immediately went to movie City Slickers! This movie is the saga of three friends who are experiencing a mid life crisis. In order to get away from it all, they decide to go off together to “get their smiles back,” so the guys head off to a cattle ranch in New Mexico for two weeks to take part in a real cattle drive along with others who are there for the same experience. The movie is a comedy, but there are some moments where the three friends, Mitch, Phil, and Ed, make one think about life by asking questions and revealing such emotional truth that it sticks with you forever.

The three guys are long time friends, but they are as different as can be. Mitch is a pessimist who dwells on everything that he hates about every aspect of his life. Phil is going through a messy divorce. Ed is an adventurer who is constantly testing his limits. They each tell about their best day and their worst day, and each one tells a differenet story.

In their conversation, MItch begins by telling the story of his best day. His Dad took him to see Yankee Stadium and watch a game. Mitch describes in detail the green grass, the brown dirt, and the green copper roof. It was marvelous he says, because their family had a black and white tv, and he had no idea how colorful a stadium could be. He says that he spent the entire day sitting next to his dad learning how to keep score, and Mickey Mantle hit a homer. He still has the program. Mitch’s worst day was when his wife thought she had breast cancer. It turned out to be fine, but that time was his worst. Sometimes our worst days turn out to be our best days!

Phil says his best day was his wedding day when he felt like he had made it. He wasn’t a goof ball anymore, but a man. He remembers that it was outside, his bride was beautiful, all the groomsmen were smiling at him, and his Dad (who wasn’t the warmest of men) winked at him. He follows it up by saying his worst day has been every day since that day!

Ed’s best day is the day he told his abusive father to leave. He told him that they didin’t love him anymore, and that he would take care of his mother and his sister. His father raised his hand to hit Ed, but he stood his ground, and his father left. Ed did take care of his Mom and help raise his sister. His worst day was that same day!

The best days for me are those days spent making memories and making every day count. A friend from the Ukraine asked me the other day, “Why do some of you Americans say, “Well, I’m here” when they are asked “how are you?” He continued, “They should be grateful for this day, but they sound like they are wondering why they are still here?” I have to agree. God isn’t only interested in our final destination. He wants to work in us and through us on the journey.

First, a Christian’s best day should be one where we are clear about our assignment. So, the best days should be when we feel like Nehemiah when he said, “I am doing a great work, so..I cannot come down.”

Next, we should prioritize tasks in the order of importance. When tasks take on an urgency rather than an importance, we miss great opportunities to have our best day.

Finally, we need a definitive timetable. One of the biggest excuses that prevents us from having our best day is, “I’ll do it later.” Tomorrow isn’t promised, so make every day count!

God has promised us that our best days are still ahead of us, and that none of us can begin to imagine what He has prepared for those who love Him.

Interrupted!

Keep listening, Job. Don’t interrupt, I‘m not finished yet! Job 33:31

In this high paced world of today, it seems that interruptions are the norm instead of the exception. I can remember my mother instructing us girls to “never interrupt adults when they are talking, never interrupt when she was on the phone, and never interrupt our teachers.” We tried our best to obey these rules, and so we spent much of our childhood standing and waiting to be recognized.

There are so many interruptions today. It is common to have someone who is talking to you on the phone receive another call and say, “I am sorry, but I have to take this now. I will call you later.” Newscasters contiually interrupt their guests while they are speaking in an effort to get another word or argument inserted in the conversation.

One of the two biggest interruptions in my life occurred in 1960 when John F Kennedy was assasinated and twenty two years ago today when our world, country, and life was interrupted by the terrorist attack on the World Trade Center and the hijacking of United Flight 93. We can all remember vividly where we were (if you are old enough) when we heard of the assasination and when we heard the twin towers had been attacked.

Everyone has a story of that fateful day on September 11, 2001. I was at school and had just taken the class to specials when I noticed a group of teachers surrounding the televsion in the hall. I walked up just as the plane hit the tower. Everyone went completely quiet as we tried to figure out exactly what just happened! Almost immediately, parents began calling or just coming to pick up their chidren. My thoughts went immediately to my own children who were in Montgomery and Oxford at the time. It is amazing the relief that comes over a parent when you hear your child’s voice and know they are okay.

Randy immediately called for a prayer service at the church, and the staff and volunteers swumg into action to make it happen. The community poured into the sanctuary to pray for our country that evening. There were tears, disbelief, and a general sense of confusion and helplessness among us all.

How do you contain the sense of anger, the bitterness, the sense of revenge or retailiation, or even the sense of betrayal by God? The future of our country was so uncertain and the grief so intense, but in the midst of all the emotions, God interrupts our doubts and calls us to forgive and move forward.

The story is told of a photographer named Joel Meyerowitz who spent nine months photographing and documenting the recovery and wreckage of the south tower inside the World Trade Center. On March 30, 2002, Joel was taking photos inside the area of the south tower when a fireman called to him and handed him the remains of a Bible he had found in the debris. The front of the Bible was obliterated, but the remaining fragments sat open faced and melted into a piece of heart shaped steel.

While most of the Bible was destroyed, the little more than half a page on top was miraculously preserved. The melted King James version was open to Matthew 5. The first thing Joel noticed was the word “Retaliation” in Matthew 5:38-39 where Jesus says, “Ye have heard that it hath been said, an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth; but I say unto you that ye resist not evil, but whoever shall smite thee on the right cheek, you turn the other to him also.”

Joel was stunned. How remarkable that of all the fragile pages that had survived, it was this passage in the midst of such an unspeakable act of evil.

Many things in our lives were interrupted that day, but God continues to show us that evil should never interrupt the doing of good. Jesus’ message of forgivness endures even on this day twenty two years later. No matter what we’ve been through or what’s been done to us, it still applies to our situation.

It is the church’s responsibility to not only remember that day and to work hard every day in praying that this sort of thing might never happen again, but also to be ambassadors of forgiveness in the midst of our interruptions.

As we remember the souls who lost their lives on that fateful day, may we be comforted in knowing that Christ still calls us to forgive just as he has forgiven us. One thing is for sure, interruptions happen, but God is with us through it all. God Bless America!

(The picture above is of American flag found in New York in the rubble of September 11, 2001.)

In Our Hands!

Therefore, my beloved, be steadfast, immoveable, always excelling in the work of the Lord because you know that in the work of the Lord, your labor is not in vain. Corinthians 15:58

Today we celebrate Labor Day which, besides being a holiday, is the unofficial kick off to the college football season. The holiday was begun in the late nineteenth century when labor activists pushed for a federal holiday to recognize the many contributions workers have made to America’s strength, prosperity, and well being.

American labor has raised the natiion’s standard of living and contributed to the greatest production the world has ever known. When I think of all those among us who labor every day to bring us closer to the realization of traditional ideals of economic progress, it is certainly worthy of a day of celebration.

There are so many whose hands are a part of all this! The “greatest generation” who served in WWII and were products of the Great Depression, “Baby Boomers”, “Generation Xers”, “Millennials”, “Generation Z”, and on down the line have benefited from the hands of those who worked and came before them.

It matters how we use what is in our hands to preserve this country and its ideals. I read somewhere of just how much our hands can matter in this world. The piece related how different hands can enhance the worth of ordinary objects. For example, in our hands, a basketball is worth about fifteen dollars, but give to LeBron James and it’s worth millions. In our hands a football holds little value, but put it in Peyton Manning’s hand and the worth increases exponentially. In our hands, a golf club can be worth little, but Tiger Woods can change the worth. copied

Jesus taught His disciples to use their hands to be distributors of His blessings and “first responders” to those in need. In the miracle of feeding the five thousand, the miracle of multiplication did not take place when the food left Christ’s hands, but rather when it left the disciple’s hands. Christ blessed the five loaves and two fish, gave it to them, and they set out to do what seemed ridiculous; feeding a multitude with a boy’s lunch!! As they watched what was in their hands multiply to feed the five thousand, they experienced the miraculous!

This parable proves that when the Lord blesses what is in our hands we will succeed despite the challenges and obstacles that confront us. Sometimes, we don’t recognize the gift that is in our hands or we even doubt its worth. We might conclude that we don’t have the right thing or enough of it in our hands to do what it takes, but we do.

God has deposited different gifts in our hands that He wants us to recognize, nurture, and use for His glory. When we take the time to develop that underdeveloped gift we have been running around carrying, we will be amazed at the potential there.

The miracle began when a boy found an unmet need and decided, “Hey, these people are hungry and need to be fed.” That is also when the disciples discovered what Jesus could do with what they held in their hands. It might have looked hopelessly inadequate, but not with God.

On this Labor Day, we need to remember that our labor is not in vain. When we use our hands to do the work of the Lord for His purposes, the work is never in vain. Our labor no matter what it might be, is not meaningless or worthless because God gives it meaning and worth.

God has given us each something in our hand that others need. It is our job to use what He has put in our hands.

Huddle Up!

Carry each other’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

This week marks the beginning of another season of football for colleges around the country, so it’s time to Huddle Up and get ready. Of course, this household will be “barking like Dawgs” while adding a few “Hotty Toddy” cheers in the mix to honor the majority of our family’s allegiance. Football has been a favorite sport of mine since high school days when my cousin played and subsequently taught me the rules so I could critique his performance in games!

There are many things about the game which remain a mystery, but nothing more so to me than the question, “why do players huddle and what goes on in there?” We all know what a huddle looks like on the field. Basically, it is a tightly formed circle of players in which the team strategizes, motivates, and celebrates. The center calls the huddle, and the players gather around him while the quarterback calls the next play, and the team uses that time to make adjustments. These days our grandson plays center and calls the huddle so our eyes are on him, but I still wonder what all happens in there??

The huddle began in the 1890’s when a deaf quarterback by the name of Paul D. Hubbard, who played at Gaudett University, developed the concept. He and his teammates would gather regularly during the game to discuss strategy, but they had to communicate using sign language. This method made it really easy for the opposing team to pick up on the signs and catch key information just by observing them. One day, Hubbard had an idea which changed sports forever! He asked the players to form a circle so that everyone could exchange information and put their strategy in place in absolute privacy, thus the huddle was born! Although the concept has been tweeked a little, the premise of close team communication and self organization for a common goal remains the same.

Huddling Up makes me think of different groups in my life who have used this same idea to work together. Groups such as team members in school, small groups of new Church friends, or our small group of long time friends. These groups huddle up to give other members a hand up when one of us is down because no one should have to face life alone. We would all be in real trouble if we had no one to pick us up when we fall. We huddle up and motivate.

We huddle up to talk through a situation, be objective, offer counsel, and exhibit love. We huddle up to strategize. Proverbs 27:9 says, “The sweetness of a friend gives delight by hearty counsel”. Sometimes family members are just too close and as much as they want to help, they can’t be objective. It’s easier to open up sometimes to somebody who has another perspective to help us strategize through our situation.

We huddle up to hold each other accountable. Sometimes we all act or move in a way that is contrary to God’s word. It’s easy to fool ourselves into thinking that we are on the right path when we are not. It takes a huddle to offer advice and point us in the right direction. The huddle is there for us.

We huddle up to celebrate and laugh. Someone once said, “If you have no wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.” There’s nothing like a huddle to help us find the humor in situations usually because many of us already been there. Hazel Lee said, “Laughing at ourselves as well as with each other brings a surprising sense of togetherness.”

One of the best things God does is provide Godly huddles along this game of life. These folks are the ones who are always willing to huddle up to strategize, motivate, hold us accountable, and celebrate! Thank God for those He has placed in our huddles to be encouragers and supporters! Let’s Huddle Up!

Be Still!

Be still and know that I am God. I am exalted in all the nations; I am exalted in all the earth. Psalm 46:10

Early one morning last week while daylight was just breaking, I went out on our deck to hang the hummingbird feeders. Everything was so still, and I was looking out over the back yard when a deer raised her head and looked back at me. She was sleeping in the grouping of hydrangas, and my presence woke her. I quietly said, “Good morning, beautiful!” She slowly got up, watching me all the time, and quietly walked out of the yard.

I began to marvel at all the things we miss if we don’t take the time to be still, watch, and listen. “A still pond reflects the sun perfectly. God is the sun. We are the lake. When your soul is still and clear, you reflect the truth, beauty, and goodness of God to everyone you encounter. As the day goes on, the wind will pick up, the lake will be full of ripples, and you will barely be able to see the sun’s reflection in the water.” copied This is a perfect illustration of the society in which we live.

In our culture, people don’t like to be still, be quiet, or be silent. It drives us crazy to be without noise of some kind because we’ve been accustomed to it. We have this philosophy that if we are not doing something, saying something, or planning something, we are not being productive and that is a waste of time.

It is true that God can speak to us anytime, anywhere, through anybody, by dropping a thought in our mind, but busyness can crowd out the thought. In stillness we can hear God more clearly.

There is an example of this in the “Be Still” necklace which one of our small group ladies introduced while we were discussing how hard it is to be still in this life. The necklace is made of two pieces which move independently of each other. Any time you are moving or busy, the pieces seem random, but if you take a moment and are still, the pieces come to the center and form a perfect cross. A simple reminder to slow down and re center your life.

There are a few reasons that being still and quiet is good for us. First, these days we don’t take enough time off to regain our strength, renew our spirt, and find ourselves in the busyness of life. If we take the time to be still, we can rejuvenate out soul.

Next, being still and quiet is good for our relationships with others. We often think that people around us need chatter, but sometimes the best thing we can do for others is just be there. There are those times when it’s best to be silent while we give them someone to lean on.

Finally, being still and quiet is good for our relationship with God. We rarely find God in the hectic moments of our life, but often we find him in the quiet moments. Mother Teresa said, “God rarely is found in the midst of noise and restlessness; instead, He is the friend of silence.”

We are easily distracted and upset by this busy world of today. God would have us just be still and quiet in His presence. Gail MacDonald writes, “The ancient desert fathers used to commit themselves to a disciplinary creed: silence, solitude, and inner peace. Only after adequate listening did they consider themselves ready to speak. Today there’s a strange logic that spiritual resource and renewal are found in constantly seeking new voices, attending more meetings to exchange half thought out opinions. We fall into the trap of believing that God is most pleased when we have maximized our information, our schedules, and our relationships. Disengagement means silence before God, a time of heavenly discussion during which we listen more than we speak.”

There is a story told of a father who was always short with his family and children. His daughter wanted to tell him a story, and she said, “I will hurry and tell it.” The father replied, “You don’t have to hurry. You can tell it slow.” The daughter replied, “If I tell it slow, will you listen slow?”

Being still and quiet is difficult, in fact, almost impossible for many of us. Once we take time to be still, we will discover that our minds and souls have been starving for stillness for a long time. Once we give our souls a taste of stillness, we won’t be satisfied unless it’s a major part of our day!

Only to sit and think of God, oh what a joy it is! Frederick W. Faber

Good vs Evil!

Doom to you who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness in place of light and light in place of darkness, who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter! Isaiah 5:20 The Message

One of the scariest times that I ever remember was in October of 1962 when the world just seemed to pause while we were living under the threat of a nuclear war. A U.S. spy plane secretly photographed missile sites being built by the Soviet Union in Cuba. President Kennedy met with advisors in secret and decided to put a naval blockade around the island to keep Russia from building any more sites. He then demanded the removal of missiles already there, and the destruction of the sites.

It was a secret until he addressed the nation. After the address, I can remember the utter panic in our community. People were canning water in anticipation of nuclear fall out, plans were made for a safe place for families to gather, and each day was scarier than the next. Randy recalls with great clarity troops moving through his small town in route to areas in southern Florida close to Cuba. Nobody knew what would happen next, but fortunately the leaders of both superpowers realized the devastating possibility of a nuclear war and an agreement was reached. It was a few days of good vs. evil.

In our world of today, I am certain that negotiations and threats go on daily on a much larger and more intense scale, but most of us are oblivious to the evil that threatens us everyday on a national scale. However, we should be much more worried about the shootings, the muggings, the burglaries, the drug and human trafficking, and general decline in Christian principles and observance of The Ten Commandments right here in our own neighborhoods and community. Evil is alive and real.

Satan first appeared when he and his angels rebelled against God in heaven hoping to match their strength with His. God overcame Satan and his followers, and the Bible says he sent them like lightning from heaven to hell. From that time to this, there seems to be something akin to a chess match between God and Satan. Every time God makes a move for good, Satan tries a counter move for evil. We know who will win in the end, but in the meantime, the war rages, and it seems that people are just content to let the evil continue.

Charles Martin says, “The greatest trick ever pulled on mankind is that somewhere, somehow, somebody convinced us that evil isn’t real.” The truth is that evil is alive and very real in this world of today. It has always been here, but recently the pure senselessness of it all has begun to frighten even the most trusting and strongest of us all.

A battle for our very existence is raging all around us, and whether we win or lose depends on the common people, not the politicians. Whether we like it or not, this is a battlefield. It has been since Cain killed Abel. There is no reason to complicate the issue because there is no gray area in this battle. It is either good or evil, and we might as well go ahead and choose sides right now! Charles Martin

There will come a time when we will have to choose a side and begin to fight. David says in Psalms144, “Praise to the Lord, my rock, He trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle.” It is time to begin training for the battle that is surely coming in our community, our schools, even our churches, because if Christians won’t stand up against evil and injustice, then who will? As Louis L’Amour once said, “If you go amongst the Philistines, it’s best to go armed.” The way to “arm ourselves” is to be courageous enough to stand for good and strong enough to fight against evil. Remember “courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway.”

There will come a time when God will announce “checkmate” in this game of good vs. evil, but until then: Rise up o men (and women) of God, Have done with lesser things. Lift heart and soul and mind and strength, to serve the King of Kings. William Merrill

Letting Go!

A man from the family of Levi married a Levite woman. The woman became pregnant and had a son. She saw there was something special about him and hid him for three months. But when she could hide him no longer, she got a little basket boat made of papyrus, waterprooofed it with tar and pitch, and placed the child in it. Then she set it afloat in the reeds at the edge of the Nile. Exodus 2:1-3

This past week school started in many systems around the state. I’m always torn at this time of year becuase I loved my role as a teacher, but on the other hand, I am glad I’m retired! Every teacher with whom I have ever been privileged to work has a deep love for children and a great desire to help guide and direct their lives.

The kindergarten team with which I worked was a loving group of teachers, but we all agreed on one thing: parents really shouldn’t walk their children into their kindergarten class on the first day of school. There was always one child who didn’t want Mom or Dad to leave, and I’m pretty sure Mom or Dad felt the same way! We knew that a crying child or crying parents experiencing separation anxiety would be temporary, but it was hard on all of us to try and convince the parents to let go and let us handle it! The child and the parents had to learn to trust us to do our job.

The story of Moses is a great example of a mother who trusted God enough to put her child in a basket made of reeds and tar and set him afloat in the river. We all know the story of Moses and how he was pulled from the water to be raised by the daughter of Pharoah, the very man who had ordered the killing of the first born males. God had a great plan for Moses, and he became the very person who led the Israelites from bondage. All of this happened because in order to save her son, his mother let him go!

A friend sent me this quote from Ashlei Woods, and it sums up what many parents are experiencing during the different phases of the lives of their children. There comes a time – many times actually – in the lives of our children where we have to put the basket in the water. We have to let go and trust the plan of the Father. The world is a scary place – a place where we fear our children could drown, but we must remember that we have to let go so that God can draw them from the waters for His great purpose. He has called us to be their parents, but they were His first.

This fall many of the young people that we have watched grow up are leaving for college or other pursuits. It’s hard to imagine those same young people who were born, baptized, confirmed, and loved are heading out on their own! I can’t help feeling for the parents and grandparents because the void will be hard at times.

The good news is that they are ready, and we can let go with confidence. These parents, teachers, and friends have equipped them for bigger and better things, and they are headed out to blaze their own trail and make their own mark in this world! It is comforting to know that wherever they go, God goes before them, walks beside them, and follows them in all that they do.

As the day approaches, let these words by Ashlei Woods comfort you, Parents whatever water you may be getting ready to put your basket into, remember that you have to put them in the water for God to draw them out and place them into His perfect plan. Though you might not be physically present with your child as much during the next phase of life, you can always petition the heart of the Father on their behalf.

Good luck, prayers, and God bless! We love you!

No Insignificance!!

I have finished the work you have given me to do. John 17:4

In this world of today, it seems there are more and more people feeling insignifcant. Whether it is about our life, our jobs, our relationships, or our situation, it is something that can really bring us down! Insignificance is defined as being too small or unimportant to be worth consideration; without power or influence; meaningless. Who would want to live feeling this way?

Everyone struggles with their purpose sometimes, and it doesn’t help that society imposes certain guidelines that makes us feel insignificant if we don’t meet the criteria. There is nothing that adds to insignificance like the news and social media. We are made to feel so insignifcant in this world, and sometimes we wonder if there will ever be a time when our contributions will make a difference?!

Every summer about this time, we have an unwanted visit from sugar ants who love coming in through the kitchen window and making themselves at home around the sink area. We know they are coming, and we take the usual steps of spraying outside, removing anything attractive, and even setting out the traps, but they are relentless. Nothing seems to deter the marching army.

The Bible encourages us in Proverbs 6:6 to Take a lesson from the antslearn from their ways and become wise. Though they have no prince or governor or ruler to make them work, they labor hard all summer, gathering food for the winter.

In researching a little about these ants, it was eye opening to see the lessons that we as Christians can learn from them. The queen ant is the center of attention in a colony and the mother of most of the ants, but she is not the chief ruler or provider. The “soldier”ants do the work, and they are responsible for the survival of the colony. So, the army I see marching in is in reality just soldiers doing the work for which they are responsible. Their work is significant!

The older ants begin each new project by doing the work themselves. The younger ants then imitate the work of their elders and join in the work. There are no supervisors, chiefs, or officers that make them work, they are just self starters and diligent workers. When we see an ant carrying a piece of bread several times bigger than they are up a slope, returning to pick it up if he drops it, and getting it to where it is supposed to be, that’s diligence.

No work is considered menial or beneath his dignity. Whatever the task, he goes along his way merrily doing his job. No work is insignificant. Martin Luther King once said, “Not all men are called to specialized or professional jobs; even fewer to the heights of genius in the arts and sciences; many are called to be laborers in factories, fields, and streets, but no work is insignificant!” If we can just impart this knowledge to generations coming behind us, none of them will have to worry about success, it will be their constant companion.

One thing you can count on with an ant, he always gives his best and pulls his share of the load. That is a quality that is desireable in humans as well. Walt Disney said, “Whatever you do, do it so well that when people see you do it , they’ll want to come back and see you do it, and they’ll want to bring others and show them how well you do what you do.”

The ant is a workaholic – he literally dies working. In other words, they never retire. The contemporary concept of retirement can’t be found in the Bible. Yes, we can retire from a job, but we never retire from work. As long as we are alive, there is always work God would have us do. Rest, relaxation, and retirement are worthy and deserved rewards for a life of hard work, but the truth is as long as we are alive, God has something significant for us to do! God has a great track record of taking seemingly insignificant people and things and using them for his glory!

The ants that visit us leave as quickly as they arrive. Their work, whatever it was, is done here and they have moved on to the next job, but the work they did was significant to them. Just like them, not one of us is insignifcant. God takes joy in using ordinary people and ordinary things for extraordinary purposes!

It Takes Two!

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. Proverbs 31:10

It’s hard to believe, but this week Randy and I celebrate fifty one years of marriage! Fifty years was a real milestone, but as the years pass we are ever more conscious of the blessings we enjoy. Most of our age group are becoming more conscious of the vows we made years ago at the altar of our respective churches as we hear people quoting those vows. We hear “in sickness and in health” a lot lately. We also hear “for better or worse” and “for richer or poorer” being mentioned in conversations. As for me, I am more and more convinced that it takes two to honor those vows and to make a marriage work no matter the age or station in life.

The story is told of a woman who went away with friends on a long weekend retreat. Halfway through the first Monday morning, she suddenly jumped to her feet and left the room. Concerned, a friend followed her to see what had made her leave the meeting so abruptly. She found the woman just disconnecting from a phone call. The friend asked gently, “Is everything all right?” “Oh, yes.” replied the woman sheepishly. “I didn’t mean to alarm you, but I just realized that it’s Monday morning trash day.” Her friend replied, “Trash day? Isn’t your husband at home?” “Yes,” replied the woman, “but it takes two of us to put out the trash. One of us rolls it out, and one of us remembers to do it!” I can identify with this lady!

There are many secrets to a good marriage, and I am sure everyone has their own. Basically, the best secret, in my opinion, is to learn how to live and work together. The number one reason for divorce today is cited as “incompatibility.” No one ever said that people who are alike should get married. We are supposed to be different. When two people with different gifts decide to love one another and listen to one another, their differences can become a source of strength rather than a source of weakness.

When Randy asked my Daddy if he could marry me, first, he said, “Mr. Drake, I love your daughter.” My Daddy looked at him and said, “I love her, too. What have you got to offer her?” Without hesitation Randy said, “Well, right now, I’ve got a red VW and a strong back.” I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the answer Daddy was looking for, but he gave us his blessing (eventually).

Randy and I married while he was still in school at Emory, so we learned quickly that it takes two. It took one of us to get a degree for our future and one of us to work to provide the finances to live. Later, we learned that it takes two to start a youth program; one of us to get the kids there and one of us to help plan programs that relate to all of them.

When we had children, we learned that it takes two to raise a family; one to be the bread winner and one to put their career on hold to be at home for a while. It takes one to be the disciplinarian in the family, and one to be the good guy! When we began to serve churches, we learned that it takes two; one to preach, teach, visit, comfort, and evangelize, and one to be there every Sunday for support and to critique.

As the years go by, it still takes two. In our household, it takes one to grill and one to do the preparations inside. It takes one to tell stories and jokes, and it takes one to listen. It takes one to laugh at the same place in movies for the millionth time, and it takes one to laugh along in spite of knowing that line by heart. It takes one to watch the UGA vs TCU football game every week, and it takes one to point out that Georgia still wins every time. It takes one to remember, and one to forget to remember. It takes one to operate a cell phone and computer, and it takes one to try. It takes one to pay bills, and it takes one to trust that they’ve been paid. It takes one to pray out loud in a group, and it takes one to be grateful. It takes one to sit at the hospital with a friend or church member, and it takes one to be empathetic and wait at home. It takes one to hug, and it takes one to return the hug. It takes two to say “I love you.”

It takes two to build a marriage and a life. Thank heavens God is there to add the third partner that makes it whole. Happy Anniversary, Randy. I love you!