Grace

“It’s okay to feel shame for something and take it to the Lord for forgiveness.  But, to walk around in shame is basically saying that God’s grace isn’t enough for you.  God’s grace is either big enough for all of us or none of us.”  Denise Hildreth Jones

I had a friend in water aerobics class named Hardy.  Hardy was an older gentleman, very friendly and extremely nice. He lived in assisted living, was divorced, and took a taxi to exercise every day.   One day last year around this time of year, I was in a conversation with him.  I asked him if he had a church, and he replied “no”.  I invited him to our Christmas Eve service at Mt. Bethel.  He said, “No, thank you.  On Christmas Eve I always sit alone in a dark room and remember the night I killed that young man. I would not be worthy to go into a church.”

As he told me his story, I could tell it was one that he had told countless times before, but it was also obvious that he had never felt forgiveness for his mistake.  Hardy was an alcoholic, and on that Christmas Eve over 60 years ago, he was driving home drunk.  A young man stepped off a curb, and he struck and killed him.  Hardy went to prison for that mistake, served his time, and when he got out, he joined AA.  Through that organization, he had mentored or sponsored many men over the years and helped them avoid the pain with which he had lived.  He changed lives for the better although he never let himself take any credit.

Hardy died this year, and now on these days before Christmas, I miss him, and find myself wondering if he ever felt God’s grace and forgiveness before the end of his life here on earth.  I know God was leading him and using him as a witness to help others, but I’m not sure that Hardy ever knew how special he was!

I hope this Christmas Eve, Hardy is finally receiving the forgiveness he sought and feeling God’s grace.  There was only one perfect man, and that was Jesus. My friend spent many years of his life trying to attain the grace that God so freely gives.  I pray that the darkness he felt is now replaced by light and joy.

Jesus said, “I am the light of the world.  Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of Life.”  John 8:12