Diane Mickler's Blog

“They who wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.”  Isaiah 40 30-31

Last week, we lost my Daddy’s last surviving sibling, my uncle  Wallace (Bubba).   He had been failing, and so it came as a blessing for him.  It was hard on his wife, Joanne and his immediate family of 18!

We will greatly miss Bubba, his kindness, his laughter and his loving ways.  He was the father of three, in law of three, Papa to 12, and great grandpapa to 8.  Wow!  He and Joanne have been married 66 years.

Joanne has played the organ for the church in my home town for 60+ years.  She has also been the choir director.  She played at my wedding and Bubba sang.  She also played at my daughter’s wedding while my Mama sang.  She and Mama have been a team for quite a while!  She taught me to play the organ (as much as possible), she taught me to knit, and she was my high school choir director.  We have a bond.

Joanne is also failing and confined to a hospital bed most of the time as well.  I visited with her on Thursday, and although I always knew she was a woman of deep faith, I saw first hand the strength of God in her.  She teared up when I kissed her, and spoke softly.  She recalled memories of her visits with Randy and me, and we laughed over good times when she and I played piano and organ duets in church.  She was ministering to me.  What strength!

The next morning, she insisted on dressing and going to say her good bye to her precious husband.  With strength beyond measure, she did just that! When she got home, she announced that she would also be going to the funeral on a gurney, if necessary.  No argument!!   She did just that!

Such love and devotion between husband and wife is hard to find these days.  I marvel at her strength, at her love of family, and at her love and devotion to God.  She showed me that strength is renewed each day if we wait upon the Lord.

“Nothing is as strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength.”  St. Francis de Sales

“Thy hand shall lead me and they right hand shall hold me”  Psalm 139:10

In the spring of 1973, Randy came home one afternoon and announced that he had applied for the job of youth minister at Snellville UMC.  WHAT?  He interviewed the next week, and the minister hired him on the spot! Randy was so excited, but I was having a small breakdown!  While he was telling me all the things we could do there, I was thinking of all the things I had to change.

Judd Hodges was the minister at the church at the time. Although I didn’t realize it at the time, he and his wife, Betty were God sent to lead us into our ministry. Judd was a mountain of a man with a quick wit and hearty laugh. He volunteered with the Sheriff’s department in his spare time helping on sensitive cases, he hunted, and rode a motorcycle! Just the type of minister with whom Randy could identify.  He and Randy bonded tightly and immediately.

Judd wanted Randy and me to live in the community and offered us a vacant house next to his parsonage. Both houses were next to the church. This house was affectionately referred to as “the old parsonage.” Those words should conjure up panic!  Randy was certain that everything was going to be perfect! God would lead us.  Did I mention I was having a breakdown?

There was only one small problem – I had to have a job!  This issue was a deal breaker.  Judd went to work to find an answer.  Coincidentally, Gwinnett county was building a new elementary school right down the road from the church in the community of Centerville.  As God would have it, the new principal of the school was a member of the Snellville church.

Judd set up a meeting for me.  I interviewed with Mr. Powell, the new principal, and very quickly, I secured a fourth grade position.  Shortly after the interview, I saw Mr. Powell and inquired about how quickly the hiring process had progressed.  He laughed and said, “Honey, Judd Hodges wants you two here, and I don’t ever disappoint Judd!”  “By the way,” he said in passing, “your portfolio was impressive as well.”  I was so glad to know I had impressed him!

In June, we loaded up our few possessions, ratty furniture, and Chief, and moved to Snellville and into our first “parsonage”.  Thankfully God was leading and all we had to do was follow.  This was the first step in letting God lead me and hold me.

Just a footnote – looking at the picture, I think we invented the “selfie”.

“How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong.  Someday in your life, you will have been all of these.”  George Washington Carver

I graduated from UGA in the spring of 1972 with a BS in Education.  I felt fully prepared to teach any child with the expertise I had acquired.  I was so wrong!!

My first assignment was a fourth grade class at Terry Mill Elementary school in Decatur.  I quickly realized that my training had targeted the “average” child, and these children, through no fault of their own, were as far from average as it gets.

Most of the children came from broken homes.  Many had no parental presence most of the time.  They had witnessed gangs, drugs, robbery, abuse, and murder!  I was at a loss as to how to identify!  Nothing in my training had prepared me for this, and none of the strategies seemed to be working.  Nothing could win them over.  I felt like a total failure as a teacher and a person.

One morning as I was driving to school listening to the radio, I heard a familiar last name connected to a stabbing death that had taken place in the school area.  I knew immediately that it had to be a family member of one of my students.  I had no idea what to do – so I prayed for the answer.

As the class arrived that day, they  were markedly sad, quiet, but quickly confirmed that the victim was their classmate, Nancy’s, brother.  This was devastating to me, and I couldn’t imagine what they must be feeling.

I wasn’t expecting Nancy that day, and I was selfishly relieved,  but she came in late.  When she walked in with a tear stained face, I said nothing but only walked to her with my arms open wide.  She walked into my arms, and we cried together.  When I looked up, all the students were around us crying as well.  Compassion in the face of tragedy.  It bonded us as a class that year when nothing else would.  God answered my prayer in a most miraculous fashion!

“His compassions never fail.  They are new every morning.”  Lam. 3:22-23

“Sometimes we let life guide us, and other times we take life by the horns, but one thing is for sure; no matter how organized we are, or how well we plan, we can always expect the unexpected.”  Brandon Jenner

My mama always taught me that when it comes to cooking,  it’s better to cook too much food than not enough.  In the early months of marriage, I took that advice to the extreme and cooked way more food than the two of us could eat.  This lapse in judgment provided the guys downstairs with dinner almost every night. They were great guys, and they quickly became part of our family.

I was “showering” one evening when I heard two things in quick succession.  First, a loud bang on the bathroom door, followed by Randy yelling, “Diane, stay in there – do NOT come out.”  Next, there was the sound of many footsteps, pots and pans banging, and yelling.

Listening to the commotion, I could only surmise that I should peek out to see what was going on.  I threw on a robe and cracked the door.  At that exact moment, a rat scooted past me into the bathroom.  He was followed closely by Randy, who was carrying a broom,  and the guys from downstairs.

I screamed and jumped up on the toilet to escape.  The poor rat was so upset that he began to try to climb up after me which just made me scream louder (I think I added some dancing as well).  At this point, the guys were able to sequester him, and take him away.  I think he died of fright!

This incident presented Randy and me with a dilemma.  Do we get a cat to take care of this apparent problem?  An exterminator was never an option, and I am not sure why.  I think Randy might have had an ulterior motive? Long story short, we ended up with the first addition to our family, a German Shepherd puppy named Chief.  I’m not sure how we got from a cat to a dog, but it happened.

This incident prepared me for many things that were to come.  I learned to  always expect the unexpected!

“It’s not the destination but the journey”  Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s taken a long time for me to appreciate life’s journeys. In years past, I always thought the destination was the important part, and the journey was just the price you pay to get where you are going.   As Randy and I set out on our honeymoon, I learned that sometimes destinations are not even planned – no reservations, no time frame, no hurry – just a journey.

That particular journey took me to Tallahassee, Florida with a stay in the third Ramada Inn we tried.  Who needs reservations on their honeymoon? Next, a scenic trip to Weeki Watchee complete with mermaids, a stop in Tarpon Springs to watch a diver retrieve sponges, a night in St. Petersburg, and a never to be forgotten stop in the newly opened Walt Disney World!!  Very romantic!

Through it all, I kept asking, “Where are we going”?  Well, the truth is, there was no destination, just the excitement of the journey!  I’ve learned through the years that some things don’t change, and if Randy is in charge, there isn’t necessarily a destination, just memories along the way.

As I compare this experience to my life, I know my final destination, but I haven’t ever known and still don’t know what the journey will hold.  God’s always had surprises along the way,and I pray they don’t stop now!  It’s ironic that now I look forward to the journey, and it’s never boring!!

I Corinthians 13:13  “So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love”.

In order for Randy and me to get married, we needed a few things to happen.  We needed a job for me (so I could support Randy in the style to which he had become accustomed), an apartment, some furniture, and cash!  I secured a job with DeKalb County Schools, we found an apartment on the top floor of an older home, Randy picked up (literally) a sofa that was on the curb in married housing, and my grandfather gave us $300 in cash!!  Things have certainly changed in the last 44 years.

As the planning hurriedly progressed (I had to be ready for school in August), Daddy offered us cash to elope, but my mother would have none of it. To add to the confusion, the engine on Randy’s VW blew up two days before the wedding, so we had to use our cash to fix it!  The repairs totaled exactly $300!.

We married on July 29, 1972 at 3:30 in the afternoon with everyone dyingfrom the heat!  The reception was at my house with cake, punch, chicken salad bites, nuts, and mints.  My Daddy was beside himself with the cost.  I can’t even imagine what he would think of receptions these days!

As we exchanged gold bands that day, I took much comfort in the fact that engraved in each one was words from the scripture found in I Corinthians: ” The greatest of these is love”.  I remember thinking, “It’s a good thing we have love because we sure don’t have anything else”.

It’s interesting the way your perspective changes over the years.  Material things are no longer top priority although I am certainly grateful for those things I have.  Now my priorities are friendships, family, love, peace, joy, hope, smiles, hugs, freedom, faith, health, and so many more non materialistic blessings.  I am so blessed to have that reminder every day – the greatest of these truly is love.

“Life’s a dance you learn as you go, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow..don’t worry about what you don’t know..life’s a dance you learn as you go.”  John Michael Montgomery

Dancing is one thing of many in which I do not excel.  For better or worse, my dance partner of almost 44 years doesn’t either!  We are prone to lead when we shouldn’t and follow at the wrong time!  Fortunately, we did have the foresight to turn the dance of our relationship over to God.

We both knew where we wanted to end up, and that was with each other, but neither of us was willing to take the lead and take that first step!  I finally wore Randy down so completely that he broke down and took the lead.

On the Easter Sunday evening, April 2, 1972, he used his exceedingly eloquent tongue to say to me, “Look, I love you, and I want to have children and get married.”  I very quickly replied, “I love you, too, and if you reverse the order of that, you have a deal!”

Later Randy’s mom remarked that he usually asked every girl he dated to marry him, but she was really glad I had been the one to say “yes”.  I’m not sure that was a compliment, but I take some comfort in the fact that I never technically said the word, “yes”.  Randy would argue that all the girls he asked always said “yes”, but he methodically backed out!

Now, almost 44 years later, I can reflect on dancing in a positive way.    “Dancing with the feet is one thing, but dancing with the heart is another.” ( Author unknown)  I like to think we dance with our hearts!

2 Chronicles 15:7  “But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”

The hummingbirds are here in full force, and that is always cause for excitement at our house!  We love the small birds, and I like to think they have raised their families here (we think we see descendants every year). They are fueling up now for their long migration south.  They hold special significance for us because Randy’s mom loved them so much, and they were a source of strength for her during her battle with cancer.

The legend is told of a forest fire burning out of control.  All the animals assembled helplessly watching except for the hummingbird who methodically sucked up water in his tiny beak, flew over the fire, and released the teeny bit of water.  The other animals demanded, “What do you think you are doing?”  The hummer replied, “I am doing what I can.”

When I sit on the deck and watch them, I am encouraged to do all I can for as long as I can for as many as I can.  I also feel that reassurance of God whispering in my ear, “Don’t give up on whatever task is before you.”

“Maybe you don’t see any purpose yet, but He isn’t finished making you.”  George MacDonald

Purpose is defined as “the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists”.  All of us have a purpose, we just need to seek God’s wisdom in finding it!

Many things must “come together” sometimes in order for God’s purpose for our lives to materialize.  This was certainly the case for us!

Randy had decided to heed God’s call on his life and enroll in Candler, but he needed three things – a job, an apartment and a scholarship!  Good jobs were scarce, apartments were not affordable alone, and scholarships were few and far between.  Within a week, God had secured for him a construction job, led him to a former fraternity brother who needed a roommate, and awarded him a full ride scholarship!!  Still he wrestled with God’s purpose for his life.

Meanwhile, acting on a feeling that wouldn’t let go, I gave up a prime practice teaching position in Athens, took a less desirable one in Atlanta, and moved there with my sorority sisters.  I had no idea why I took such decisive and immediate action, but I know now that God was working on both of us. The three of us girls needed help finding an apartment in Atlanta, so who did we call? Randy.  Sometimes God’s purpose and the way he achieves it in our lives is a little scary!

Randy was working construction, going to school, and needing someone who could type papers.  I was doing my practicum, finishing school, and had the skill to type papers!  Every afternoon, he would drive over to bring his drafts for a paper, visit with us and have dinner!  In God’s time, our relationship and a purpose was born!

“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.”   Robert Bryne